What are you resisting in your life?
There is a saying that “what we resist persists.” In order to live an authentic and fulfilling life, it’s important to pay attention to what you are resisting. There is a reason behind why you are resisting something and in facing it head on, you create great opportunity for yourself.
The most valuable lesson lies in the challenges that we resist. In resisting challenges in our lives-over time, the effort and energy required to continue to resist something will become more difficult than embracing it.
Nowhere is this better illustrated than by an all-too familiar challenge: relationships with other people. The reasons for resisting them are many; fear of commitment, not wanting to be vulnerable, avoiding compromise-all essential elements to a healthy relationship.
Or, you may resist things like open and honest communication because you are afraid of the other person’s reaction. You don’t want to “make waves” or create an uncomfortable situation. So you choose not to say anything and it festers in your relationships with others.
When we don’t address things that bother us-head on, our energy and focus is concentrated on not moving forward through what we’re resisting. And this keeps us from moving forward-in many areas of our lives.
The impulse towards resistance is rooted in avoiding the hurtful or bothersome parts of the experience. These feelings are usually ones of fear, shame, pain, or being out of control.
However, the more we resist certain parts of life, the more those feelings stick around-the deeper we feel them, and the harder it is to overcome the source of those feelings. We develop habits to dull the pain and forget what we’re resisting-yet it still remains. Lurking in the recesses of our minds and our bodies.
The most valuable lesson lies in the challenges that we resist. And over time, the effort and energy required to continue to resist something will have an impact on our health too. We might notice ourselves feeling tired a lot more easily or having less of an ability to bounce back from setbacks. Or perhaps you get sick easier than normal or have heightened anxiety? These are all signs that you’re resisting something in your life.
What’s important is understanding what you’re resisting, why you’re resisting it, and then deciding if the struggle is worth continuing. Resisting a certain feeling or habit will only lead to more pain as long as you continue to resist.
The shift comes when we stop resisting and accept whatever it is we are resisting in ourselves and being present with it.The pain that felt so pervasive starts to lessen as the resistance lessens.
As you notice yourself feeling good again, try to remember what got your attention – what made you pay attention? What was worth fighting for? And how did you stop resisting?
Your answers to these questions are key to helping you move forward when you find yourself resisting other things in the future. This is all an essential part of creating more happiness and fulfillment in your life on your ongoing journey of creating the best life possible for yourself.
Overcoming resistance on your own can be very challenging, especially if you have been resisting areas of your life for an extended period of time. Recognize when you need help with this part of your life, seek professional assistance if necessary because what’s worth fighting for is not worth losing.
You may find it necessary to seek out the help of a professional therapist or life coach who can help you and guide you through your resistance.
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